Market Adventure Part 2

The conclusion...

“Oh, I need some scotchie!” off we go in search of the scotch bonnet peppers. I “spy” a vendor with a whole heap of scotchie…the colors look bright even from here, good!…soon we get to the stall and discover that although the colors look vibrant from a distance, the peppers are not so robust looking, in fact they look tired and dried-up-ish plus the price was way too high. Maybe that was the “browning” price…..Not to be deterred we doubled back to a section of the market we had skirted earlier. Lo and behold, there was a man selling peppers at his stall. “How much fi di pepper?” Essie, the designated spokesperson (my complexion and sort of “St. Andrew accent” is not a good bargaining advantage) enquired. Now here is the trick, taught to me by my able market companion (she was taught by a vendor), don’t buy pepper by the dozen. Better to buy by the weight and you will get more for your money. With this foreknowledge I await his reply “$120 a poun’” – BINGO! Good price so for a brief  moment whispering between us we concurred that it was a good price and I decided that I will take a half pound…Essie didn’t need any so she tells the man “sell me ½ pound”… So the hombre takes up two small plastic bags, why two bags, I thought to myself.

 “How much yuh waaan’ ?”

 “1/2 pound” (is this guy standing on his ears or what?)

 “half poun’ fi yuh and half poun’ fi she?

“NOOOOOO!!!!” we say in unison - was he paying attention or not?

“ We just want half pound!”

 Finally, he starts to put them in the plastic bag. Meanwhile, I turn to Essie to ask where we could get some stringed beans at a reasonable price.

“Wha’? me kaaaan ‘ear wha’ you a tell har sey yuh nuh, whey yuh a talk so soft fa?” he interrupts my conversation with Essie! I cannot believe the GALL of this man!! Without even missing a beat I say to him

“Listen, mi naaaa talk to yuh!! If I were speaking to you, you would have HEARD me, but I am speaking with her and SHE can hear me!!”

“Den Laawd, mek you a ‘andle me so rough faah’?” he asks almost like a little child scolded for misbehaving.

“Because you too nosey!!! I was not speaking to you. You must not be too nosey it’s not good for you!!” I tell him in my most maternal voice and manner yet!

“Where yuh come fram?”  “Yuh come fram Juumaica?” "A faar-in yu come fram?" he asks.

Why the cross questioning? Too many questions!!! I give him a $100 and wait for my change which he takes forever “searching” for all over the place. Essie had turned to scout out our next move and I automatically turned to see if there were any stringed beans close by when I hear the vendor say “oh so you a lef’ di change wid mi”

“Yuh mad??!!!” I ask him and stretch out my hand for the change. Then to my consternation the vendor says “ Yuh know sey fram mi look pan yuh mi see sey yuh love money eeenuh!”

 “Look here nuh give me mi $40”

By now I am thinking what else I need so I look aside for a moment to spy out the landscape when I feel the coins being put into my palm lightly.

“Eeeh, eeeh yuh han’ soooft eeeh, wow!” I quickly draw away my hand as if bitten by a rattle snake and give him the evil eye!!! “Thanks” I say as I put the pepper in my bag and walk away. 

“Look ‘ere mi fren, mi fren, wait nuh, mi can tell yuh someting?”

“NOPE, you have said way too much already”.  Note to self: Avoid all nosey pepper vendors in the future!  Sheesh!

While making our final rounds we realize that we cannot find where the woman that offered us the lucea yam is? Where did we see her? We knock heads together and retraced our steps and found her right there at the entrance of the market! YAAAAY! Mission accomplished! We got everything we wanted and more! Now we have to struggle with the bags back to terminal at North Parade. Essie has to go to the Meat shop and so I decided to purchase some pig’s tail. She did the ordering while I watched the bags. My bag is not too difficult to manage even when filled to capacity because it is one that you wear as a knapsack.

I help Essie with her bag, the traditional one, and we walk side by side until we get to the Bus terminus….MAN the sun HOTTTTT!! The cranberry water I had a few minutes before has all but sweat out and I am feeling thirsty again.

We suffer for a while in the broiling sun waiting for our bus. Our hopes were dashed twice earlier when what was our bus, suddenly change to a number 31 on one occasion and the second time the driver just left no explanations, NADA!

Finally one comes along and out of NOWHERE a bunch of hooligans of all different descriptions rushes the door of the bus. Needless to say that we, who are standing in a line waiting to board the bus, are totally peeved at this type of behavior! They push, bump and squeeze...I hang on to my goodies bag and watch that I do not bump my head as I am “lifted” into the bus by the sheer force and volume of bodies.

Not too sure when I make it over the last step or when my feet touch the ground I pay the fares and Essie points out a seat nearby…empty at least so I thought. As I approach, a very miserable, cantankerous looking older woman, who obviously see Essie pointing the seat out to me gives out “a sumaddy seat, mi pay har ticket lang time see har dere a com”. I glanced behind and sure enough near the driver was an older looking woman with a very brightly colored tie-head and an equally brilliant outfit making her way down the aisle.

Fortunately, I found a seat closer to the second/exit door beside a decent enough looking male passenger.

Finally, a seat in the AC, a place to rest my legs and to relax for the next 45 minutes or so that it takes to get home…not realizing how much battering I took from the sun and all the walking, I close my eyes and slowly doze off ….then it happened!

“Can I get a praise di Lord?” “Can I hear Hallelujah?” “Amen”…Can I get some peace and quiet? - I ask??!!!

As the bus moves along the sermon begins in earnest, this lady, I must admit is not as loud as I have heard some. She makes the usual points about changing her life (highly commendable I must say); about her “faambily dat in sum big, big trouble right now”; about her not allowing “di debil fi overthrow har” and a number of other things (throw in obeah-working, bad-mindedness, fornication here).

The audience was largely apathetic and the man beside me was busy mumbling “heverybody in yah done know ‘bout Gad a’ready”; aside from a couple of women giving a feeble praise the Lord, nobody was giving her the necessary “fuel” to fire into a “brimstone and fire” sermon so common on the buses. She is a smart woman and realizes that the people are “hopeless” so after singing briefly she prays for everyone on the bus…then silence again… I open my eyes and realize that we are approaching the traffic lights at Lyndhurst and Maxfield Avenue, half way through my journey.

 I close my eyes again and take full advantage of the silence and the AC…What a day!!